Life Goes On

So, it would seem that the season is winding down and coming to the end. Its strange because at present I can't say I'm going to miss it. People are leaving, the snow is diminishing more and more everyday. I'm excited to see and do more things, and not just in Australia. I'm ready to get out and explore the world. I'm ready to live.

Sure I'm missing home. Every day. But I also know that things are happening there without me. And so they should. Nothing should stop being simply because somebody is missing. And nor should I. I shouldn't hold back and end up wishing I'd done it differently. Not for the wrong reasons at least.

I want to take every opportunity and give it everything. There shouldn't be any other way. I want the memories to bring back great feelings everytime I think of them. I've had the ups and downs over the last three months, but I don't want to think of the downsides. Because that's what life is about. Sure, we need the lows to appreciate the highs. It doesn't mean they should dominate and take over though.

Its never too late to make up for it. I mean, I'm happy with the things I've done and all my choices. Ultimately they have set me up for my future. So why should I regret that? Its just time for a change. I've worked hard, now its time to really enjoy it, in a different way. Time to give myself reason to think 'I miss that' . I guess I'm going to bring out the party girl I once knew and show people what I can do, with the people that matter. I have three weeks left and I'm going to make the most of it.
I will no longer be in the background watching the world go by.

Daydreaming far into the realms of Travel Envy

I'm doing it again. Doing what I do all the time. Daydreaming.
Why do I let myself? Thinking the grass is greener when in actual fact I haven't actually finished cutting the lawn I'm currently on.

Like now for example, all morning I have spent my time looking at USA travel visas and road trips. After that I was looking into Dubai, then Thailand. I'm in frigging Australia! I'm doing it all backwards. I've not even seen half of the country and I'm already moving onto different ones. I know the end of the season is near and it's probably just that I'm excited to get off this damn Mountain after being here for four months, but I really should be exploring whats available for me to see a little more locally than planning on jumping on  a plane to go millions of miles away.

The thing is I'm surrounded by people who are heading off to Canada/Japan/anywhere that's not this country. And frankly, I'm jealous. That's right. I have travel envy.I want to go to these exciting places. I m totally aware that I'm already in a pretty exciting place. I don't need to be reminded (or maybe I do) that 'at least I'm not in England anymore...' I just want to see and do everything, everywhere all at once.

I'm not sure why I feel its so important to rush everything. I need to learn to enjoy whats happening in the present. I read something on a page earlier, somebody's Bio i think, that just simply said 'Living for tomorrow'. Is that what this is? Is that what I'm doing now? Living for tomorrow? Shouldn't I really be getting today finished up first. Thinking about 'Living for the moment'? That's a much nicer thing to be doing.
Que Life perception altering moment # 2349095. Well probably. I seem to have so many changes in my outlook on life it might as well be. It does keep it interesting though. But it's also frustrating, as you can probably gather from the current ramblings happening in the blog.

So my aim for this afternoon is to start looking into all the exciting things I'll be doing in good old 'Stralia. Because, well that would make more sense right now. Maybe the Great Ocean Road. Or finding some rain-forests. Or the outback? Or maybe just the city where there is some actual civilization and trains, buses, shops (and less likely to have too many snakes and other creepies)!!!
So this is me, very excited for the next adventure, wherever it is. Suggestions welcome - Probably best to make it in the general area of Australia though....

the finding

I've been in a different country for over four months now. My main aim in doing this trip was to begin to find myself again, become who I should be. I had just come out f one life experience and decided to embark on a new one, because, well I now had the freedom to do so. Nothing holds me back these days, or so I thought.
I realised though that I was holding back and that the time I have here has more potential than what I had previously graced it with.
To be honest I've realised that this walk of life deserves more than what I have so far given it. I had a chat with a friend at home, which mixed up my emotions somewhat, but it gave me the ability to see where I was going wrong.
I was reminded of why I was doing this. To gain perspective. Take time for me. Instead I have been letting people and thier lives get in the way. I figured thataybe I shouldn't be checking facebook and longing for other things. Honestly what I'm doing now is greater than that. Or at least for me. Yes I may miss things/people/events etc, but I'm out to write my own story. I control the outcome, nobody else.

If I wad to waste this opportunity, then I may as well have not gone anywhere at all. Taking a step back is sometimes needed to remember. I'm the one who put myself here, so I need to make the most of it. I regret not partying more, holding back too much because of stupid things in my head.

Its time to let go, be out for number one and do tge things I set out to. There is no way to find me if I am muddled with the thoughts about others This time is mine.

Something new

The end is coming. But it feels like its only just beginning. There are mixed feelings about these coming weeks. Some are disappointed and some are excited.everybody is feeling something.
Personally I'm getting ready for the next adventure. I don't want the end to be good or bad, just a chance to move on and gain something new. I'm ready for the challenge. I don't know what is going to be thrown at me next. I always knew that now would come to an end.
I guess I'm a little over it all now. I think that's important for what I'm trying to achieve. Knowing its time to let go and siezing the oppurtunity to change.
I can only plan this to a point, after that who knows. Sometimes its better to let fate take you away where it needs to. If it is good to you, you will always end up in the right place at the right time. The power is within, and your personal thoughts can guide it well. Why worry, when being carefree is so much more fun?

A Different Slice of Reality

Travelling is a strange thing. It seemed so daunting when I first decided I was going to do it. Maybe its the fear of the unknown where everything is terrifying until you experience it. I guess some people are comfortable with what they know, others are ready to jump in and deal with the fear, to realise there's nothing to be scared of.
I realised that now I'm travelling, things begin to seem normal; accents, phrases, temperatures. All of it totally natural and expected. It's not scary anymore because I've seen it, done it and experienced it. I've probably dealt with the worst it could be, right now I'm on top of a mountain where its bitterly cold and when it snows its a blizzard. In a month's time ill be in the worst heat I've ever been and maybe I'll get kicked in the face by a kangaroo.

All this because I decided to jump on a plane. The world isn't that big anymore, people travel everyday. I work withh so many people from different pockets of the world, and we've all travelled to get here.

I also learnt not to think about what I'm leaving behind but only what I'm gaining. Home will always be home and friends will always be friends. Right now I'm in a different world learning, living and creating a new story in my life.


And its awesome.

Not a new chapter, merely a different one

There are many thoughts in ones mind this evening. Like what a strange tradition it is to be dressed as a zombie in mid August. Its nobody's birthday, its definately not Halloween and I'm sure there has not been some outbreak of a deadly zombie like virus in recent weeks, meaning that in fact, these people are real zombies. Of course I would be making Like Simon Pegg and going to the Winchester for a beer, until it all blew over.
Maybe I'm just past the need to unnecessarily cover myself in make up,rip up my clothes and scare the crap out of people these days. saying that, I probably don't need a 'theme night' to do that, just a long week of work on no sleep and a lack of coffee would be enough...

I think a lot of people were thinking I was going to be the life and soul when I got to the mountain. You know, a party animal type, dancing until the early hours and drinking myself blind at every opportunity. That's not the version of me they've received though, I hope they aren't disappointed. Maybe it is a little sad that I'm only 23 and already career driven and focused. Right now I have the chance to see a beautiful country. And I'm working hard to make sure its the greatest experience. Why on earth would I F that up by drinking away my money, making a fool of myself and having nothing but a headache to show for it. No, I'm happy to be here working hard, head down and snowboarding at every opportunity. There are other ways to have fun.
Clearly I'm not the social butterfly I once was, I'm content with growing up as I am. I still have friends and things are very much going my way.

But don't make the mistake in thinking this girl has hung up her dancing shoes... I still know how to shake it on the dancefloor and turn on the charm. But I do it on my terms, when I'm in the mood. Picking my social episodes carefully.

A Saturday Night

So you don't want people in your business, yet you are one of the biggest gossips I know?
Its funny how its ok to talk about other people, but once it's you that's being talked about, you do anything possible to stop it happening. I know that this kind of thing happens in small communities, for some I guess its just second nature to spread  people's private lives around and make it into a drama. Maybe its because TV reception is terrible up here and its the only form of entertainment.

Sure, I may have jumped on the gossip train a few times, but I've never started the rumours. Although I'm not even sure what's worse, starting the rumour or passing it down the line.

let me get to my point though; its unfortunate that we can't go out, drink, dance, kiss or flirt without that rumour mill beginning to turn. A Saturday night shouldn't consist of a series of events that get blown out of proportion, scrutinized and judged because everybody was there for the same reason, to let their hair down after a long week. I'm getting fed up with these small town rules and having to keep myself to myself. Frankly, its boring and I bet the grass is greener.... Well probably not, but I can hope!

ignoring my own reality to join the masses

Today was just another day where I found myself at work, unable to be out on the slopes enjoying the sunshine and getting some fresh air and time on the board. I think maybe my resentment must have shone through. Plenty of annoyances to rile me up.

However, it being deathly quiet for the most part, it did mean I was able to catch up on gossip and fashion columns and get myself ready for a new springtime wardrobe. Bring on the city and real shopping centres.

Then, of course I became distracted by anything celebrity and finally found out the name of the Royal Arrival. George... What's the betting on a rise in popularity for that name now?

And to follow that I decided that being part of facebook and instagram followers, my Social Media fix was not complete without a Twitter account too, and was thrilled to have 2 followers AND a retweet in under 10 minutes. I'm getting used to it again, I think my tweets will be a little different since my outlook on life has changed and I've become a different person. I guess just watch this space and folow me @AmimiJ.

So that was my day, ignoring my reality and joining the masses of tweeters, instas and bookers...