I've been in a different country for over four months now. My main aim in doing this trip was to begin to find myself again, become who I should be. I had just come out f one life experience and decided to embark on a new one, because, well I now had the freedom to do so. Nothing holds me back these days, or so I thought.
I realised though that I was holding back and that the time I have here has more potential than what I had previously graced it with.
To be honest I've realised that this walk of life deserves more than what I have so far given it. I had a chat with a friend at home, which mixed up my emotions somewhat, but it gave me the ability to see where I was going wrong.
I was reminded of why I was doing this. To gain perspective. Take time for me. Instead I have been letting people and thier lives get in the way. I figured thataybe I shouldn't be checking facebook and longing for other things. Honestly what I'm doing now is greater than that. Or at least for me. Yes I may miss things/people/events etc, but I'm out to write my own story. I control the outcome, nobody else.
If I wad to waste this opportunity, then I may as well have not gone anywhere at all. Taking a step back is sometimes needed to remember. I'm the one who put myself here, so I need to make the most of it. I regret not partying more, holding back too much because of stupid things in my head.
Its time to let go, be out for number one and do tge things I set out to. There is no way to find me if I am muddled with the thoughts about others This time is mine.
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